When conditions are sufficient, things manifest.

things manifest

Here are some of the changes I’ve made within the last.. wow, has all this really only happened within the last two months?

  • Exchanged everything I use on my body for an eco-friendly, recyclable, sustainable, chemical-free and usually organic version. (With the help of Amazon Prime, if you’re wondering.) That’s organic and chemical-free shampoo, conditioner, body lotion, deodorant, powder, lip balm, sunscreen, toothpaste, facial wash, and soaps.
  • Exchanged household items for eco-friendly, recyclable, sustainable, chemical-free versions, that don’t harm the environment. Like dish washing materials, laundry detergent, fabric softener, household cleaners, paper towels, bathroom tissue, facial tissue, drain cleaning, and even tape.
  • Sent everything I had to get rid of to TerraCycle, which offers free recycling programs “for previously non-recyclable, or difficult-to-recycle, waste.” This includes unwanted beauty products, foil-lined granola wrappers, water filters, even cigarette butts and ashes; i.e. lots of things you can’t put in your recycle bin. And they even pay you to ship it to them! (I linked to the US version but there are programs for many countries.)
  • Started a daily guided meditation program via the Calm mobile app. I’d never liked guided meditations before and wanted to try new things. Their desktop website is also gorgeous, and you can choose a custom amount of time you’d like to meditate. (Go ahead, try it for two minutes, I’ll wait.)
  • Created a new Log In user on my laptop because my old one is from three years ago when I was an almost entirely different person, to whatever degree that statement can be accurate.
  • Decided to go 100% with my organic diet…okay, maybe more like 90% because some things I just cannot find, and there may or may not be the occasional fast food french fries for which I am not at all sorry.
  • Ordered grass-fed organic beef from Alderspring Ranch since I need meat in my diet right now, and this is the best way to get it: from animals that are given healthy, happy lives and respected, especially for the immensity of their sacrifice.
  • Started sunbathing in direct sunlight for my daily dose of Vitamin D because my blood levels are currently only eighteen. The dminder app has been an exquisite help, telling me the best times to lie out and for how long, to both maximize my Vitamin D production and avoid sun damage. I don’t think I could do this without it. It’d be too mentally taxing keeping up with so many numbers and guesstimating how much I was getting. Thanks, ontometrics!
  • Got a series of repeat neurological tests and heard the wonderful news that my brain hasn’t changed at all, which is significant because from 2009 to 2011 a lesion on my pons had become “minimally more prominent.” If it were to enlarge at all I could become locked in or just plain die, so I’m very, very, very glad that’s not something I have to contend with.
  • Started seeing a doctor to help me treat the MTHFR (methylene tetrahydrofolate reductase) deficiency, because I know my body is finally able to handle it and my homocysteine has skyrocketed since two years ago. I’m now clinically deficient in folate (B9) and subclinically deficient in B12. I started experiencing severe neurological symptoms and had been in my wheelchair a lot recently, but not since I started all these changes.
    • See my original diagnosis post “MTHFR Deficiency Cannot Be Cured, But Treating To Cure is All I’ve Ever Done” to read a small summary about what this genetic polymorphism actually does.
    • And get tested if you haven’t, because I’m noticing almost all of us with M.E., Lyme, and many diagnosed with CFS (particularly gradual onset cases) are the 10% of the population with these clinically-relevant mutations. The test is cheap and covered by insurance. Depending on which ones you have, they affect everything, and if you don’t know you have them you could be gradually sickening yourself with enriched foods and multivitamins, not to mention all the medications you shouldn’t take because of an increased clot risk…like birth control. If anyone tells you this gene isn’t significant it’s because they don’t understand it.

All these changes started about two years ago, after I realized I was in a major relapse and had hit the point where I could no longer treat any condition that actually had a treatment–not the Lyme disease, bartonellosis, MTHFR deficiency, nothing–without dying in the process. I knew from the inside out that if I didn’t stop, I was going to become a “died trying” story. Beyond the scope of Western medicine, Eastern medicine, and everything in between, my only remaining option became modification of lifestyle and diet to slow things down. As the saying goes, if you can’t help, at least don’t harm.

What I didn’t realize at the time was that by stopping all treatment and beginning a different way of life, I was actually preparing my body for treatment at a later date (i.e., now), by allowing my system time to gradually remove all the excess that had blocked my methylation pathways. Like Lyme disease, I once thought methylation crises were all hype, but when it happens to you…

So later, about a year ago, I began looking for changes I could make in my daily life. I ordered new brands of my medicinal supplements with the least amounts of fillers. I use two water filters: a PUR faucet filter to remove pathogens from the tap, then pass that through a ZeroWater pitcher to remove everything else, like fluoride and aluminium. I swapped my coffee for organic fair trade coffee, my coffee creamer for honey, my reusable plastic bottles (I know, I know) for glass Lifefactory waterbottles. That’s when I resumed buying organic produce and vegetables whenever possible, stopped using the microwave unless too weak for the stove, and stopped using plastic to drink out of, eat out of, cook with, or store food in, completely.

Meanwhile, I was still only getting sicker, because this was pre-IVIG and “the bugs” were still advancing. But I felt intuitively it was all helping me on a cellular level and that I was absolutely doing the best thing possible for this body, even if I had yet to feel it physically. So I persevered, and it snowballed into what you’ve read in this post.

When I started on this new path, I felt something change not only in me, in my decisions and brain, but in my Soul. If I were still, I could feel this Inner Knowing that said, because of the choices I made, my life was going to turn out completely different from what it would’ve been, even though any path was free for me to choose as I saw fit. This shift felt as real to me, spiritually and energetically, as it would feel if you were to physically walk in a different direction on your way home. Was it a vibrational shift