Ask Amy: My co-worker is 6 months pregnant and smokes cigarettes, weed


Pricey Amy: I’m a waitress. Certainly one of my co-workers is six months pregnant. Each time she takes a break, she goes out again and smokes cigarettes. Generally she smokes weed. She has been smoking ever since I began right here, 4 months in the past.

I’m a mind-your-own-business type of individual, however I’ve witnessed a member of the family undergo from bronchial asthma. I do know that smoking whereas pregnant will increase the possibility of the child having respiratory issues.

I do know that my co-worker goes to the physician for prenatal care and stuff, however each time she takes a break, my coronary heart sinks and I really feel responsible. Ought to I say one thing to her, and if that’s the case, what can I say?

Apprehensive: It’s common data that smoking is dangerous for one’s well being and that smoking whereas pregnant might negatively have an effect on the unborn child’s well being. In case your co-worker is seeing her physician commonly for prenatal visits, then this can have been emphasised many instances.

Nobody ought to smoke weed whereas working or whereas pregnant. Marijuana impacts the mom’s cognition, coordination and response time.

In keeping with the Substance Abuse and Psychological Well being Companies Administration (

“No quantity of marijuana has been confirmed secure to make use of throughout being pregnant or whereas breastfeeding. In 2018, the American Academy of Pediatrics launched its first official pointers, advising girls who’re pregnant or nursing to keep away from marijuana use as a result of it isn’t secure for them or their youngsters.

“Whether or not smoked, eaten in meals (edibles), or vaped, marijuana is stronger than ever earlier than, which makes use throughout being pregnant particularly dangerous for a growing child’s well being. Marijuana accommodates almost 500 chemical compounds, together with the mind-altering compound tetrahydrocannabinol (THC). These chemical compounds can go by way of a lady’s placenta to her child throughout being pregnant.”

I feel you may have the best affect in your co-worker by attending to know her and by making an attempt to discourage her from ingesting pot. Be nonjudgmental and compassionate towards her. She might let you know that she is utilizing pot to deal with nausea or to spice up her urge for food. Ask her: “Have you ever requested your physician about that?”

Pricey Amy: My older brother and I’ve all the time had a tough relationship. Sooner or later earlier than our 52nd marriage ceremony anniversary, my spouse died. I referred to as my sister, and requested if she might inform our older brother of my spouse’s dying. He has had nothing to do with me for over 15 years. I would not have his deal with or cellphone quantity, and even know what state he’s residing in.

My sister did relay the information to him. Over the 2 months since my spouse’s dying, I’ve obtained letters and playing cards from mates everywhere in the world. There was nothing from my brother or his household. Was I asking an excessive amount of of him to at the least acknowledge my spouse’s dying?

Devastated: I’m so sorry you may have skilled this very robust loss.

Your brother’s selection to not specific his condolences appears to be taking over extra space than the numerous expressions of sympathy you’ve obtained from so many others. You aren’t required to do something proper now, besides to really feel your emotions and check out your hardest to maintain your coronary heart open to those that you recognize love and care about you.

If this continues to eat away at you, you may get your brother’s contact data out of your sister and attain out to him. You’re disenchanted that he has stored his silence of so a few years, particularly by way of this robust interval. Do you wish to attempt to forge a path towards communication now? If that’s the case, then you must say so, plainly — expressing your ideas and emotions in writing.

I wish to add a powerful warning: You can not pull somebody to the desk in the event that they don’t wish to come. Your brother might not have the emotional instruments to just accept any bid you prolong. That is one other loss you could have to just accept.

Pricey Amy:Ignored” was a authorized secretary who “by no means” took her personal trip days as a result of she was apprehensive about not having protection whereas she was gone. I hope she doesn’t make this error in her subsequent job! At all times take your trip days — you’ve earned them!

— Been There, Gone Fishin

Been There: “Ignored” was feeling very put-upon and unappreciated. I agree that she gave manner an excessive amount of.

© 2023 by Amy Dickinson. Distributed by Tribune Content material Company.

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