Miss Manners: Common prospects wish to befriend clerk

Pricey Miss Manners: I work at a comfort retailer close to my house. I see the shop’s regulars each day, and naturally we change into pleasant. Some I like greater than others.

Often, a buyer will ask me for my telephone quantity, claiming we should always get collectively. This request comes from each female and male prospects, some focused on friendship and a few in romance.

Since I’m not focused on pursuing any friendships or relationships with prospects, how do I gracefully deny the request for my quantity?

“Sorry, I by no means give out my private telephone quantity, however you possibly can often discover me right here. Proper by the sundries aisle.” (Miss Manners does so love sundries.)

Pricey Miss Manners: A few outdated buddies and I had deliberate a dinner at their home. After I received there, they each greeted me and the husband defined that his spouse was sick with a foul chilly (not covid, fortunately).

I instantly stated that I’d go, and we might reschedule it when she was higher. Each of them insisted I keep. It appeared awkward it doesn’t matter what I did, leaving or staying.

My sick buddy went again to mattress, and I wound up sticking round and really making dinner. I thought-about suggesting that the husband and I am going out to a restaurant, however abandoning his spouse when she was sick appeared just like the worst possibility.

Since then, I’ve thought I ought to have simply left, however they have been so insistent within the second, it simply appeared gauche. What ought to I’ve carried out?

Not what you probably did, which led to having your protests rebuffed and your publicity to illness elevated, all whereas making the dinner that was promised to you.

It’s best to have left, overlaying their protests with good needs for a fast restoration and a postponed dinner.

Pricey Miss Manners: Some months in the past, my husband and I purchased a home. The earlier house owners have been round throughout the course of extra typically than is typical, and our closing went easily. In truth, one agent stated it was the simplest closing they’d ever been to.

One of many house owners fist-bumped me in celebration, and I stated, That’s what occurs when everybody behaves like adults. His spouse was much less enthusiastic as a result of she liked the home and was unhappy to be leaving it. She appeared to be on the verge of tears.

Quick-forward to some days in the past. Whereas consuming at a restaurant, I acknowledged the couple once they have been seated close to us. They didn’t seem to acknowledge us, they usually have been with different individuals. Given the circumstances, I believed it was finest to not greet them as a result of I didn’t wish to create a clumsy state of affairs, particularly given how emotional the spouse had been about leaving the home.

I really feel a little bit bizarre about it now, however my rational aspect believes I did the correct factor. If we run into them once more, although, I could also be inclined to acknowledge them, if the state of affairs permits for it. What are your ideas?

That saying good day to somebody you acknowledge shouldn’t be an invite to listen to the way you ruined their lives.

New Miss Manners columns are posted Monday via Saturday on You’ll be able to ship inquiries to Miss Manners at her web site, It’s also possible to comply with her @RealMissManners.

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